I’d often thought it was a woman’s thing. You know, how they get all emotional over the milestones. Especially the lasts.
You know the ones. My last child’s first day at pre school. My last child’s last day at pre school and so on and so forth.
Yet last night something strange happened. I’d given Josh his bedtime bottle and put him in his cot.
It’s one of those clip to the bed things so he’s right there beside me but not in the bed so no fear of my fat ass squashing him.
As I placed him gently into it I noticed, that, when he’s stretched out he is nearly the length of it. We’d known it wouldn’t be much longer and his full size cot is on order.
I was struck by a feeling of melancholy. Josh is the LAST baby of mine I’ll hold. His ass is the last one I’ll have to deal with poonamis from.
Don’t tell Jen Hogan but I’ve a feeling it’ll be me crying as he goes to pre school on his first day.
We’d not planned more after Little Miss. She was supposed to be the last. Then Dr’s had told us it was highly unlikely we’d conceive again due to issues with Mrs OMGs ovaries. As the saying goes.
I didn’t get this same feelings I’m experiencing now with her though. I was my normal, kids grow its what happens self.
I can only guess that the reason my state of mind has altered is because, shortly after Josh was born by section, they removed Mrs OMGs tubes. Meaning there really are going to be no more babies.
In the truest sense of the word he is my last. Every first he does will be the last. They might not have much impact at the time but all those little milestones from Buddy and Little Miss are there in my mind.
That shaky first step. The first, and thank god only, trip to A&E following an Ambulance with one of my kids in it. The first plaster cast for a broken bone. I remember them all.
Josh is nearly six calendar months old . He has his two front teeth, can perform an Olympic worthy roll onto his stomach but hasn’t yet managed to crawl. It’s coming though. Then. Before we known it he’ll be walking and talking.
Perhaps it’s just Lockdown that has me all melancholy. I’m sure it won’t be long till I’m back to my usual self.
I hope so. If not send wine and ice cream.